Hi Everyone! In case you don’t already know, I have two BEAUTIFUL daughters who I love with all my heart. I also have a fun time job and side hustle. I became a mother at the age of 23 and a mother of two just eleven months later (I know, I know). Many people think I just have it all together all the time and that’s just not the case. Let me share with you some of my confessions from the not-so-pretty side of being a mom of two under two.
- I have anxiety – a lot! According to Google, Anxiety is characterized by feelings of worry, anxiety, or fear strong enough to interfere with one’s daily activity. Now, let’s be clear, I have self diagnosed myself lol but that’s what I feel. Whenever I am not with my kids, I’m thinking of all these thing that could be happening and they are not always happy thoughts. Having small kids with the responsibility of keeping them alive 24/7 is a hard job and sometimes my anxiety gets the best of me. (moving on because anxiety is really another topic for another post)
- I’m currently re-learning to take care of myself: Yes, you read it correctly. After roughly 18 months of being pregnant, and months of taking care of an infant AND toddler and now chasing down two toddlers, you can probably imagine how easy it is to neglect my own needs. I’m finally making time to do things I need to do. One of them was starting this blog (yay me).
- Sometimes things don’t get done: I go to sleep with dishes in the sink, the kids have gone to bed without a bath and I used to feel bad, but I have come to terms with “It’ll still be there tomorrow.” No point in stressing over what will still be there tomorrow.
- It’s not always rewarding: “Parenting is rewarding” they said. “It’s the most wonderful feeling ever” they said. Well what they, whoever they is, didn’t tell you is that you won’t feel like that every minute of everyday. I love being a mom, but it’s not always fun. Recently, both girls had a stomach virus (yeah, gross, I know right) well for about a week, I has cleaning up throw up and changing diarrhea diapers (too much info? Sorry) and guess what, my husband had it too. So here I was, doing all this. I had to take off work to endure the late nights and early mornings. I was exhausted and no matter what I did or how hard I worked, nobody was getting any better because the virus just had to run it’s course. Where’s the reward in that?
- I’d rather work that be a stay at home mom: Most people think moms work because they have to. I work because I want to, because I need to. I know plenty of moms reading this would probably give anything to be able to stay home with their kids, but unfortunately I am not one of them. I love my career and I honestly feel that being a stay at home mom isn’t for everyone. I do enjoy breaks where I get to stay home for weeks at a time with them but that is a full time job that I wouldn’t volunteer for.
- I didn’t “snap back” and that’s ok: With media today, you see celebrities and IG models who post their post-pregnancy abs two days after birthing a child. Well thats not the case for me! Although I do get complements, I am no where near confident in my mommy body. I have stretch marks galore and a muffin top; my breasts are no longer perfect and my skin is a mess! I’m definitely no Beyonce but I’m ok with that.
I absolutely love being a mommy! Being a mom gives me joy, it give me purpose, and it has given me strength beyond measures. Being a mom is tough and you never know what the next person is experiencing. The next time you see a mom you think has it all together, just know that she has some confessions too.